Captains Log: Day 1 Post-Botball
I wadded up a burrito wrapper and while swatting it over a stack of dry goods into the trash can whilst trying to call it as a home run a Raccoon that apparently made residence in my apartment at some point scampered up and robbed it only to prance off on its hind legs squeaking something to the effect of 'and that'll be out number three as we head now to the bottom of the 7th'. Dejected, I sifted through the garbage and fashioned dirty plastic utensils and empty soda cans into a makeshift audience and played an atonal country/psytrance stretch for my crowd. They were unfazed and I can't be certain, but I think I heard them call Miguel Cabrera a weak little bitch boy who can barely lift a bat and then insulted the Diamondbacks so I promptly gathered the heretics and unceremoniously threw them in the dumpster. Needless to say this does not bode well for the road ahead.